Beginning Therapy
I was initially treated by a psychiatrist, then a psychologist.
While this helped, it took a full 10-years for the flaming apparition to depart from my brain. Same thing with the grinding, rasping anxiety.
What I was left with though, was the crushing depression that was everywhere in my life. Plus there was this paranoia, not psychotic, but a constant undercurrent of fear. Maybe this was what the anxiety turned into.
Day after day I was plagued with hopelessness and thoughts of suicide. If it weren’t for my wife and my mantra, I might not have survived the ordeal.
While this helped, it took a full 10-years for the flaming apparition to depart from my brain. Same thing with the grinding, rasping anxiety.
What I was left with though, was the crushing depression that was everywhere in my life. Plus there was this paranoia, not psychotic, but a constant undercurrent of fear. Maybe this was what the anxiety turned into.
Day after day I was plagued with hopelessness and thoughts of suicide. If it weren’t for my wife and my mantra, I might not have survived the ordeal.
Addendum
They were Dr. Troshinsky (sp?) in Bethesda, and Dr. Barry Hurwitz (sp?) in Pikesville
Dr Troshinsky prescribed Elavil, but we couldn't follow it up because I was on the road.
The first breakthrough came with Dr. Hurwitz. I showed him pages in the office magazines whose colors were disturbing to me, as representing what I was constantly experiencing, but there was a breakthrough in a direction I hadn't expected.
I made the comment that "I was small for my size" to which he replied, "How can you be small for your size? You are what you are.
< lightening bolts>
They were Dr. Troshinsky (sp?) in Bethesda, and Dr. Barry Hurwitz (sp?) in Pikesville
Dr Troshinsky prescribed Elavil, but we couldn't follow it up because I was on the road.
The first breakthrough came with Dr. Hurwitz. I showed him pages in the office magazines whose colors were disturbing to me, as representing what I was constantly experiencing, but there was a breakthrough in a direction I hadn't expected.
I made the comment that "I was small for my size" to which he replied, "How can you be small for your size? You are what you are.
< lightening bolts>